


Tainted Vineyard

by CynicalBonehead



Category: Smile For Me (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alcoholism, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Confrontations, Dissociation, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Intervention, Lesbians, Mental Breakdown, One Shot, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Supportive Tiff, Supportive friend, canonish i guess lmao, enabler Lulia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2019-10-17
Packaged: 2020-12-21 06:10:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21070172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CynicalBonehead/pseuds/CynicalBonehead
Summary: Lulia is at her breaking point. She loves her girlfriend so damn much, that saying No feels impossible. However Jerafina's addiction is getting to the point where it isn't "cute", or able to be ignored anymore.Lulia has to find her voice again, to stand up to her girlfriend.For Jerafina's sake and her own.(Heavy theme around alcohol. Please head the tags.)





	Tainted Vineyard

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lora_Blackmane](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lora_Blackmane/gifts).

In the evening, the air was saturated with dread and anxiety. The anticipation and air stuck in her chest was too familiar for Lulia. The support one is supposed to give in a relationship is always mutual. Expectedly, it is never at the same time, usually when one needs it the most. However Lulia pondered when too much support enabled her girlfriend and her horrible habits. Sure at The Habitat her tipsy demeanor was cute. The amount she said she would normally drink, almost seemed like a joke. Yet she couldn't see the evidence disproving the joke theory right in front of her.  
Nights of holding her hair and rubbing her back was not intimate as she wanted. Mostly because Jerafina was face deep into a toilet.

'Is something wrong with me?' Lulia pondered. 'I should be behind her no matter what...but why am I so exhausted all the time? I'm even having a hard time keeping up at work. What am I doing wrong???"

Finally, she had enough. Lulia needed an outside opinion, one that was unbiased and honest. She picked up her pocket sized phone book and dialed right away. The friend graciously agreed to meet up to have a feelings jam. Lulia did NOT want to meet at a bar or any place with alcohol. The last thing she needed was to be surrounded by the substance, that was stealing her girlfriend from her. Tiff agreed, and offered to have her over.

"I want to...I'm just slightly scared of leaving. What if she comes back and has no way to get in? Or she's too drunk to work with her keys and she has to sleep outside the door? Or-"

Tiff cut her off right then and there. "-Stop. She has a key right?"

"Yeah.." Lulia hesitantly responded.

"Alright. If she can't get in the apartment, it's her fault Lulia. Not yours. If you really don't want to meet up, I understand." Tiff remained quiet as she waited for something from Lulia.  
A sound. Something.

Lulia took a shaky breath. "Okay. I'll be over soon. I-I'm doing this for me. Or her and I. Oh..You know what I mean." She sighed.

Tiff smiled. "I do. I'll be waiting." Her tone was comforting and barely raised above her usual tone. It felt like a long time friend putting a hand on her shoulder and smiling proudly.  
It was what Jerafina needed. She needed to feel like she had someone on her side.

Calling Tiff was not a mistake. As soon as Lulia arrived to Tiff's condo, the atmosphere felt drastically different than her apartment. There wasn't a faint smell of alcohol, hidden cans or any trash on the floor. Scented candles of pomegranate and cherries hugged Lulia; finally letting her take a deep relieving breath. Tiff smiled at her and hugged her casually. She showed Lulia where to put her shoes, and lead her to the living room.

"Want anything to drink hon'?"

Lulia got just a little tense, but realized that she didn't need to have anything alcoholic. It was okay to ask for water, or soda, or even fruit juice. It was okay. It was okay. Lulia smiled at Tiff and simply responded with water. She slowly sat onto Tiff's, spotless couch. The euphoria she was feeling, was pushed aside in an instant.  
She could hear it's horrible voice ringing in her mind.

'Of course her apartment is better than yours. She has recognition and stardom. You. Have nothing but an alcoholic girlfriend. You could have had this. You could have been a star. Instead you're a washed up woman, clinging to the legs of an ACTUAL star. Just hoping her stardust will get on you too. You're vile, you know that?'

Lulia's hands began to shake, she had no energy to argue with her anxiety. It wasn't entirely wrong. She wasn't happy. She was envious. Was she really using Tiff though? Did Tiff just pity her? Was their friendship formed out of pity and envy? She could feel the world around her getting out of focus. Only her body was clear to her.

Tiff had a glass of water for Lulia, thinking she was just spacing out on her couch. It was very clear once she came back, that it wasn't the case. Tiff sat the glass on a coaster, on her coffee table. The sound made Lulia's head jerked up a bit to look at her. Everything was still fuzzy, but Tiff stood out amongst the fuzzy background. Tiff sat down next to Lulia and took off her circular shades. Her face was painted in mild concern for her friend.

"Maybe you should drink it a bit. No offense, but you look really out of it." Tiff bit her lip a little, hoping it wasn't too blunt.

Lulia focused on Tiff speaking, and focused on it while drinking her water.  
"Sorry...I've just." Lulia tapped her fingernails on the glass in thought. "I've been so frazzled lately. Anything can set me off these days. I...I'm so tired Tiff. I don't know why." She ran her fingers through her hair, while keeping her breathing at a steady pace.

Tiff faced her and thought for a moment before speaking.  
"Love, you know why. I don't gotta spell that out for you." She folded her legs while continuing to speak, "Flowerkid did tell me a few things from their last visit-"

Lulia jolted forwards out of panic. "What?! I. Listen-"

Tiff held up her hand to Lulia.  
"You can stop right there. Just from your reaction, it's obvious that something happened." She looked at Lulia with a seriousness Lulia had not seen before. "Did she pass out while trying to take them home or not?"

Lulia could feel the blood drain from her face. She just wanted to vent, not be pushed into a corner with the truth she tried to avoid. Yet it was one of the most painful to throw at her. The angry phone call was still so fresh in her mind...  
She gripped her dress and bit her lip. Trying everything in her power to not show weakness and cry. She wasn't supposed to cry in front of people. Yet there she was. Tiff's facial expression softened upon seeing Lulia's tears run down her face.

"Yes..That's..That's why we can't see them. I should have put my foot down with her right then..No! Before that! Way before that! I just... I'm so scared Tiff.. I'm scared of how she would react. I know she would never put her hands on me, don't get the wrong idea. I just.." Lulia took a deep breath and looked off into space, "I don't want her to possibly leave me." Lulia hugged her arms close to her body.

Tiff frowned. "So you kept enabling her because you were afraid of her leaving you?"

Lulia slowly nodded. "I don't want to be alone Tiff. I know it's awful of me but-"

Tiff got up, hugged Lulia and began to stroke her back. Lulia let out a tiny gasp. It had been so long since someone genuinely held her like that, it just shocked her senses. Lulia slowly wrapped her arms around Tiff and laid her head on her friend's chest. Eventually, her hiccups and sobbing slowly faded. She felt relaxed, cared for, and safe. They couldn't tell how long they held each other in silence, but it didn't matter. Lulia needed someone to remind her that what she wanted, wasn't best for her or for Jerafina. The DUI’s, arrests, panicked phone calls, trashed apartment were going to stop one way or another. 

Some time later, Lulia and Tiff went back to Lulia’s apartment. Lulia decided that enough was enough. She started with the kitchen. All of the beer, wine, whiskey were all being poured down the drain. Tiff trashed all the empty bottles and had quite the smile on her face while doing so. 

“What are you smiling at?” Lulia questioned while holding champagne over the sink.

Tiff chuckled at her. “I’m proud of you. You should be proud of yourself too.” She winked.

Yeah. Tiff was right! She was the one who decided to do this. Perhaps all she needed was someone to push her to make that stance. Lulia started to laugh, it grew to be loud and full of joy. This was her first victory.  
“Thank you Tiff. I needed someone to kick me in the right direction.” Lulia said before searching the bedroom for a secret stash. 

It took them longer than they thought it would to pour out all the alcohol in the apartment. They were practically exhausted by the time it was over. Lulia plopped herself down on her couch and glanced up at the clock on the wall. 

‘10:34 pm’ it read. 

Tiff frowned when she saw the time, it pissed her off that Jerafina wasn’t even home yet. She then glanced at Lulia, who was clearly thinking the same thing. They decided to pass the time with mindless tv watching until Jerafina would get home.  
It would be almost half an hour until Tiff and Lulia could hear Jerafina unlocking the front door. Lulia tensed up anxiously. She didn’t want to confront Jera. She didn’t. She really fucking didn’t.  
She felt a hand on her shoulder and it brought some awareness back to her. It was Tiff nodding at her, reassuring her that she wasn’t alone. With a deep breath, she turned to look at Jerafina in the doorway. 

“Ohhhh heeeey. I didn’t know Tiff was comin’ ovurrr. Hay guurl!~” Jerafina was obviously smashed, much to the other women’s disappointment. 

Lulia grew conflicted in that moment with so many thoughts bouncing in her mind.  
“Would it be better to confront her when she’s sober?? Wait she’d have a hangover so she’d be even more ill-tempered… Tiff is already here and I don't want to send her home right after she agreed to this.. Haaaaaa…. What do I do…” She thought. 

Tiff looked at Lulia and made her presence a bit more known to her. She only had a slight idea of what was running through her friend’s mind. The last thing she needed was back track, when the confrontation was so close.  
“Jera, sit down with us for a sec’. Lulia and I have some stuff to talk about with you.” 

Jerafina raised a brow, but obliged. She kicked her heels off and staggered over to the recliner across from the couch.  
“Mm’kay. I’m here. What’s up?” She kept looking back and forth between Tiff and Lulia. She couldn’t help but be suspicious. 

Lulia took a deep breath and fidgeted with her fingers. “Jerafina. I love you. You know I love you.. I did this because I love you.”

Jerafina sat up a little in surprise. “What do ya’ mean. What did you do???”

Lulia bit her lip. This was the point of no return. “I got rid of all the alcohol in the house.”

As expected, Jerafina looked anything but happy. Her eyes were furiously moving in thought before she spoke. “What the HELL LULIA?! You threw away my shit becuz’ of love??!! Thatss not love!!”

Jerafina got a look from Lulia, that she had never seen before. Lulia had stood up, filled with the bottled emotions. Her adrenaline made her face flush, fists ball up in rage and she stood up glaring daggers at Jerafina.  
“LOVE IS NOT LETTING YOUR GIRLFRIEND DESTROY HERSELF WITH HER ADDICTION!!! LOVE IS PUTTING MY FOOT DOWN AND TELLING YOU THAT YOU HAVE A PROBLEM!!!” She huffed, but continued. “DO you wonder why you can’t hold down a job Jera???? Why I have to work so much??? Why I can’t bare to kiss you anymore???”  
Tears slid down Lulia’s face, as months of frustration just came pouring out of her like her tears.  
“I...I’ve made up my mind Jerafina. You. Need. Help. If you don’t get help, I’m gone.” 

Jerafina’s eyes widened and her voice died down after hearing Lulia’s ultimatum. She slowly took off her glasses and took a deep shaky breath.  
“You’re right...You’re always right Lulia….I….” Jerafina almost choked on her own sobs, but Tiff interrupted her before she could continue. 

“Jera. Are you willing to go to rehab to get help? I know one just a few miles away. I’m not sorry about being part of this. You need help and we are doing this because we care..” Tiff looked sincerely at Jerafina.  
“We will be right there with you this whole process..”

Jerafina looked at Lulia with tears in her eyes. “You’ll...help me too..r-right???”

Lulia’s expression softened slightly and she reached out to hold Jerafina’s hand gently. “Yeah. I love you Jerafina. You won’t be alone.” 

That was all it took for Jerafina to fully break down, and wrap herself around Lulia. Lulia wrapped her arms around Jerafina and rubbed her back as she loudly sobbed into Lulia’s shirt. Tiff walked over and hugged Jerafina. All the comfort and support she felt radiating from them just made the situation seem less frightening. She wasn’t going to lose the best woman that walked into her life.  
She refused.  
Lulia was more important than a damned bottle.


End file.
